This Martha Stewart rip-off is the worst magazine that I have read in some time. Gad. Upon first glance, I thought I would be reading a magazine filled with quick, semi-unusual recipes and boring decorative table tips. And so it was, but with so much more. Not only did I find what I expected, but I also found a literary contradiction of sorts. For instance, their is a real strong emphasis on organic diet and then on the next page, a complete review of the best-buy frozen meat pies. Huh?
My personal favourite is the monthly page called "B, L, D" (breakfast, lunch, dinner) that outlines a featured celebrity's daily diet. In one, I learnt that Lisa Edelstein from "House" eats: 3 glasses of organic yerbe matte tea, 2 shots of Dr. Foster's Essential Calcium from Herbs and 1 container of WholeSoy yogurt for breakfast; romaine, avocado and tofu salad with Asian dressing, 1 bottle of water, 1 cup of green tea, and a double latte for lunch; and stir-fry with rice, perrier with lime and 1 cup of calm tea for dinner; and her guilty pleasure is Vosges Creole Bar. So essentially this women doesn't really "eat", but instead loads herself with tons of caffeine. Hmmm, no wonder she is so skinny... I can see why knowing her diet is important. Then in the next month, I read that 14 year old Spencer Breslin from the movie "Zoom" (ever heard of it??) also has a terrible celebrity diet. He eats (gorges on): a cup of coffee for breakfast (doesn't everyone feed their 14 year old coffee for breakfast??); a sloppy joe and a diet pepsi for lunch; then for dinner has a cheeseburger with lettuce and tomato, a hot dog, a handful of potato chips and 1 diet pepsi (why bother with "diet" soda at this point?); and finally for a midnight snack, a giant piece of chocolate cake . Is he on the Adkins diet or something?? Where are the vegetables???!! Ahhhhh! I have to ponder the question: What do I need to know how unhealthy these rich people are?
The advertising in this mag is definitely geared towards the sexist stereotypical "house mum". There are countless advertisements of mum-lady dishing up, hauling around, and/or happily presenting her white bread family (a boy, a girl and dud, I mean dad) with enormous glazed turkeys, rice dishes, bowls of stuffing, super sealed garbage bags, etc, etc. There are also tons of cleaning product ads, especially paper towel advertisements, that say things like, "Don't fear the meatball", "Can't be alone with chocolate? Hurry, call the girls" and other dumbs remarks (I guess the assumption is that all the "girls" are at home, baking chocolate cakes waiting for their friends to call!) . And of course, there are several advertisements that detail cheap-o processed food recipes, my favourite being the "fiberccino" being a coffee beverage with Benefiber added to it (oh, as if the taste of added fiber to a traditionally precise cup of espresso would go unnoticed).
The last thing I'll mention is the interesting column "How to...". From this I learned how to make a no-knit scarf. Basically you chose a skein of bulky, textured yarn (they suggest something around $26 US funds), and then unravel the yarn and fold it back and forth to form a 5 foot long bundle. Then tie each end. Wrap the scarf around your neck and voila, you're done! My opinion of this: viola you're scarf looks like worm turd. Your "scarf" looks like something your child made at preschool. It looks like the shit that clogged your vacuum, the "yarn" you pulled that was spooled around the revolving brush of your dirt devil. Get real and get off the Valium.
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